Friday night was a rough one for me.
I pulled a muscle in my back a few weeks ago, and can't seem to get it right. I'll get it back to normal and then I'll either do something to tweak it while teaching dance, or I'll over work it during the day.
Friday night I started feeling my back flare up, but ignored it, because I had to. (Noel was out of town and I had to get stuff done by myself.) Anyways, long story short, I was in the worst pain of my entire life. And yes, I've pushed 2 children out of me au natural. (Epidural wore off before Charlie came, and didn't kick in fast enough for Walker.) My back was in full spaz mode, I couldn't catch my breath, and I felt like I was going to be sick from the pain.
I got out of bed, and literally crawled on my hands and knees to the kitchen to try to find some pain reliever. When I realized that I couldn't get my body to stand up straight enough to reach the medicine, I laid on the kitchen floor and sobbed. I prayed out loud that I would be able to reach the medicine, and that I would actually be able to swallow it. (Fun fact: I can't swallow pills. And yes, they make liquid everything these days).
I mustered up the energy to reach the medicine, took it (yay!), and got in the shower because that was the only place I didn't want to straight up die.
About twenty minutes later, I fell asleep.
Ok, super long sob story about my weekend. But here's what I'm taking away from it all.
1. I need to start taking care of myself.
Noel is out of town or working all the time. (Not to make him the bad guy...I'm very proud that he works so hard for our family.) But with that, I need to start taking time for myself more often. I need to actually schedule those doctors' appointments (I hate the dentist), need to drink more water, and do all of the things I know I should be doing, but somehow don't have the "time" to do it. I also don't need to allow other people to guilt trip me into doing anything that I don't feel is necessary.
2. I need to ask for HELP.
This one is the hardest for me. I feel like I can handle it all by myself, but then realize (as I'm laying on my kitchen floor in excruciating pain) that I might need an extra hand every now and then to help out.
I hesitated writing this post, because I didn't want to seem like I want sympathy. That is absolutely not what I want.
I'm just hoping that when you read this, you will make it a point to take care of yourself, or ask someone for help even though you don't want to, or that you might reach out to someone and help them.
Happy Monday, everyone! :-) It's going to be a GREAT week. I just know it.
(Side note: I have been to the doctor who said I pulled a muscle and to keep icing it. So I actually did go to the doctor. Pat on my back.)